My 03 Yukon is possessed...

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ClickClack

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I’ve got some weird stuff going on with my ’03 Yukon. I’m going to start from the beginning. Sorry if this gets a bit long-winded, but I like to cover all my bases. Here goes...
I’ve got a 2003 GMC Yukon 2x4, not sure which model, but it’s the mid-level one (leather seats but no OnStar, no heated seats, etc.). It’s got right at 150K miles. Not long after I got it years ago, when it only had about 30K miles, it started doing something weird. Randomly when my car was parked and locked, the alarm would start going off. I realize this was because the computer thought the back hatch was open, even though it wasn’t. I tried to disconnect the wiring in the back hatch to see if that would fix it, but it didn’t. I was starting to get pissed because it would go off in the middle of the night, and forced me to just leave it unlocked, which I hate doing, even in my relatively safe neighborhood. So I took it to the dealership to see what they thought, and they acted like they had never seen it before. So this goes on for years, kind of sporadically. It would happen a lot for a couple weeks, then stop for months, then come back. Fast forward a few years. It started doing it within the last year again, after it hadn’t done it for a while, maybe a year even. So I start doing some research. Turns out it’s a pretty common problem. I figured it out with Google and I don’t have some certified mechanic’s degree. I think it’s the body control module. Anyone else experiencing this? But now it’s worse. Now it’s not doing the backdoor unlocking thing, mainly because I figured out a workaround (lock it w/ keyless, then unlock once to unlock the driver’s door, open and close it then lock it back with the key). But now every time I crank my car, within about one minute of driving, it starts dinging like hell, and it says service brake system, and my parking brake light and ABS light come on. But my brakes are fine. They work fine and I don’t have any trouble. Also, it always tells me I have low coolant. But when I check it, it’s fine. It’s like my car is possessed. I love this car and want to drive it until the wheels fall off. And I do most of my minor maintenance and repairs myself (brakes, oil changes, spark plugs, etc.) so I want to do this myself. I’m assuming the BCM controls everything? Is that why it’s making my car go haywire? Also, I’m assuming I can buy a new BCM and install it, but I probably have to go to a dealership to get it programmed to my car? Thanks for any help anyone can offer. My car is insane. If you’re still reading, I am impressed and thankful. Thanks. Oh and I realize I kind of jumped right into things, but I'm glad I found the forum. Looking forward to some solid intel. Click-Clack.
 
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